the big mother f*cker welfare rant.

This one is going to be a doozy, so please read the entire post before writing me a 10 page comment about your life story and how much of an asshole I am. If you still wish to write me a 10 page comment on how society forced you to get knocked up while on welfare, then I’ll give you a story how society FORCED ME to use rough 2-ply toilet paper to wipe my ass instead of the good soft stuff.

Oh, and for the record, “welfare” here means full blown don’t-have-to-work-all-inclusive aid. I’m not going to pick apart food-stamps but not free-housing or check, etc. I say government ticket, I mean the entire government ticket.

This is how I see the welfare system working:

Girl “falls in love” at the ripe age of 16, and through the magic of laziness, hormones, stupidity, and complete irresponsibility allows herself to get pregnant by some loser. The loser, taking parenting advice from rap stars and TV idols, leaves that bitch and moves on (“hey, don’t hate the playa, hate the game”). The mother, now single and with child, goes on the system to get assistance until she can finish school and get a job. At which point she gets off of the system and pulls herself up by her bootstraps and becomes a model mother and a productive member of society.

That above I have no problem paying for. Hell, believe it or not, that’s what the system was intended for! However this is what mostly will happen:

Girl above, when her child is 2 years old, finds another douchebag reject and through the magic of not-fucking-learning-the-first-time gets pregnant AGAIN. Repeat about 4 more times. Kids run out of control and tear my shelves apart, and she bitches at me because the Septra suspension for kid #5 is grape flavored and not cherry.

Let it be known herein and throughout the tubes of the Internet. If you are already on welfare, and you get pregnant again (ie: you already are established on the system and you spread your legs and accept seed again), you are the most irresponsible, stupid, waste of human skin on the planet. You are nothing more than a receptacle for some dude to keep his sausage warm and serve no use to us other than to leech away our money like a tick on the ass-end of society. Go and make porn flicks because your only mental and physical skill in life involves your mouth and between your legs.

It blows my mind how absolutely stupid someone can be to be on welfare (you know, implied that you cannot take care of yourself so the state has to take care of you) and bring another child into this world. Getting pregnant once is a freebie in my book, shit happens (though barely now that Plan-B is OTC). The second time however is 100% you’re-a-fucking-moron. The third one on is what-the-fuck-were-you-thinking (oh, you werent). Birth control is FREE! It just takes a bit of effort (ie: getting off of your ass) to get! Have they gotten the memo that welfare is not intended for living off of for your entire life? Did it ever occur to them that if the welfare system suddenly says “Uh, no more money for checks, so sorry!” they are completely and utterly fucked? Ugh, so retarded and so stupid.

Lets compare 2 irresponsible acts:
Spending your check on spinning rims instead of job-interview clothes: IRRESPONSIBLE
Bringing another human-being into this world when you are 100% reliant on the state to wipe your ass currently: REALLY-FUCKING-IRRESPONSIBLE

Usually if you cannot afford something; car, boat, whatever; it gets repo’d. YOU CANNOT DO THAT WITH A CHILD! Pregnancy isn’t some magical unknown event that just “happens”. Its as preventable as avoiding getting your car stolen by LOCKING IT, or avoiding wrecking your car by NOT RUNNING INTO WALLS. Which means that the only way these career welfare mothers are getting pregnant is out of sheer laziness and stupidity. Surprise surprise! Close your legs until you can afford to open them!

My solution, and one offered by other readers on here, is every 3 months, when you get your welfare paperwork reevaluated, you get a shot of Depot Provera. I don’t give a rats ass about side-effects, these people are already on the downward slide, so we’re doing damage control now. You want your check, you get your depot shot. You don’t want your birth control shot? Then I guess you get no check! The state pays for your life, the state gets to make the rules. In “real life” if my boss asks me to clean the toilets, then I clean the toilets. Know why? Because my job pays for my life, so my job gets to make the rules. I realize that the “job” part is a foreign concept, but just trust me on this one.

I know I’m going to get at least one comment by some idiot saying that “reproduction is a right”. Well, to them I say “Leave your gated community in your $60k SUV once in a while and open your fucking eyes. If they have a right to reproduce like fucking rabbits, then I have a right to not pay a fucking dime towards the product of their irresponsibility.” Seriously! Fuck and reproduce all you want, but don’t come to Uncle Sam asking for a double fist of government cheese.

So, I challenge you all to give me ONE DECENT point that refutes my belief that the woman who is on welfare and gets pregnant yet again is the most irresponsible person on the planet.

legalize the shit already...

Well folks, I hate to tell you this but terrorism works. You can’t stop people willing to kill others without remorse until they get their way. You can’t compete with that. You’re fucked unless you can find a way to stop their money supply and I am referring to the drug cartels !

But how can you do that? How can you stop the money drug cartels use to buy guns, bullets, rocket launchers, grenades, policemen, judges, lawyers, and politicians?

Drug legalization.

That’s right you fucking pussies. Legalize marijuana, cocaine, heroin, LSD, ecstasy, and mushrooms. Every fucking drug the drug cartel sells should be legal. If grown men and women want to fuck up their health, let them. How can we tell someone how bad snorting cocaine off the back of a stripper’s ass is for their health, when we allow people to smoke cigarettes and drink alcohol?

And why should we do this?

Because it takes money out of the drug cartels’ hands. Why would someone pay a creepy old guy hiding in the back of an ally $90 dollars for a quarter of weed when they could go to a well-lit grocery store and buy it for $55? Plus, the government could make money by taxing it. They could turn the nations largest cash crop into a multi-billion dollar industry that would help get us out of this recession/depression.

But it won’t happen. Why? Because the War on Drugs benefits rich white businessmen. State and federal prosecutors, trail lawyers, judges, private prisons, politicians, the DEA, the FBI, the CIA, state and local police. To many people make money off of this war for legalization to help.

They will use the money they’ve stolen to lobby Congress and the White House for tougher drug laws while placing their people on all the major news stations and have them say, “If drugs are made legal, it will be the end of America. People will be so high on PCP and crack cocaine that they’ll storm into your house and ass fuck your wife and daughter. If you don’t have a wife and daughter, they’ll ass fuck you and your son. They’ll ass fuck everybody in your goddamn house. Not even your fucking pets’ buttholes are safe from the ass fucking that’s going to take place in this country if drugs are made legal.”

So I want this shit to continue.

I want the shootouts to spill over into Texas and catch those fucking Minutemen in the cross fire and kill ‘em. I want the violence to spread into New Mexico, Arizona, Louisiana, Arkansas, Mississippi, Oklahoma, and Alabama. I want people to cry out to the federal government for help but can’t get any because our soldiers are to busy fightingoverseas in a stupid fucking war.

I want all of this shit to happen and I hope I get to watch it on CNN, MSNBC, and Fox News while smoking  some weed.

♥ LUSH Cosmetics

A while ago my fabulous friend Priscilla recommended this website I ordered a bunch of stuff that I SWORE I was going to review but I LOVE all of it so here you go! LUSH Cosmetics has become one of my beauty staples and there are so many things I still want to try !

I'm LOVING Ro's Argan Body Conditioner; it's an amazing moisturizing lotion that you use just like hair conditioner, rub all over, rinse off, and pat dry! I love to use their bath bombs which smell great and help me relax.

The Latte Lip Tint is a moisturizing lip balm with a hint of coffee flavoring to give you a "pick me up" when you need it. This blend of almond oil, organic jojoba oil and Japan wax will give a moisturizing boost to your lips while still being light to wear.

There are SO many new products it would take me days to review them, you gotta go and see them for yourself! You won't leave LUSH empty handed. While you're there, check out the Dirty Soap, No Drought Dry Shampoo, Lustre Dusting Powder, and Henna Hair Dyes ^which i'm trying sometime next month review on this coming soon since it is a hair dye!^

There is a product for everyone at LUSH!

never using polish in a bottle again ♥

Sally Hansen Salon Effects Real Nail Polish StripsHave you ever heard of a Minx manicure? If you’ve ever seen a celebrity rockin an amazing design on their nails, beyond the 2 to 3 color designs we get from stamping, then it was probably a Minx manicure. Minx is a salon-only manicure process that involves taking a thin strip of flexible polymer that is heat activated and applied to your nails. Katy Perry and Beyonce are huge fans of Minx nails, but as you can imagine, the process is a bit pricey at about $50 per manicure.

Finally, we have an affordable at-home alternative to the Minx manicure. Sally Hansen has just released their Salon Effects Nail Strips and I am crazy about them! It’s different than Minx in that it is REAL nail polish that you simply press onto you nail, but it is similar in that you can get crazy cool perfect multi-colored designs. There are 24 options to choose from – if you’re not into nail art, they also offer solid colors and glitters, which I prefer over applying regular polish, as the process is super fast with no drying time and they lasts for about 10 days!

Pros

1. Only $9.95 per box (compared to a salon Minx manicure at $50)
2. Lasts until you remove it – no fading, chipping, or receeding at the edges
3. Zero drying time
4. Quick and fairly easy to apply – quicker than base coat, nail polish, design stamping, and top coat (you can do a top coat if you want it to last longer i suggest this makes it more shiny and i love me some shine!)
5. Easy to remove with nail polish remover as you would with any nail polish

I tried to think of some constructive criticism, but I came up with nothing. These nail strips are everything I look for in a manicure – unique designs, quick application, no drying time, and lasts forever. The only thing I could come up with is I’m ready for more design options asap :)

Here is the final result gave my little cousins a tiny manicure :) 

haters "gonna" hate

Note: This is a hateful article on hating. Is it acceptable, since I’m directing my hate for good? You tell me.

When you’re not happy with a situation what do you do? Talking about it can be a good start. You might call it complaining…But heck, complaining feels good. We’re all guilty of a good venting session now and then. In fact, it’s healthy to let your feelings out. But what happens when venting and complaining turns into a conversation about hate?

I can’t engage in conversation at the office without hearing someone talk shit about another person within the first few minutes. Myself included. So what’s with the open hating? Isn’t this the sort of thing we used to do behind closed doors and only to our closest and most precious friends?

Turning on the radio or reading the news has become a painful, mood killer. Every day people are going off on anyone who thinks differently than they do. As if an opinion on a matter has just become a religion that must be defended to the death.

Blame reality shows, tabloids or the internet, but it comes down to a personal choice. Saying something hateful for the sake of hating is only putting destruction into the world.

Can’t we agree to disagree? Silence is the best answer? The Golden Rule: If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all? Any of these ring a bell?

What happened to our class? If Snob was on one end of the spectrum and Evil Monkey was on the other, where do you think we would be?

All I’m saying, is there is an awful lot of hateful things being said, whether regarding politics, religion, or personal opinions on (fill in the blank). I’m not perfect. I can be a mean and hateful bitch. But I plan on making a conscious effort this year, starting today, to have a little class. To take the higher road. To understand that though I may not agree with others all the time, I can agree to disagree. There are enough haters hating on each other – let’s not add to the count.